Sunday, October 23, 2011

It's a dogwich

Who doesn't like a sandwich? It's simple, versatile, and delicious. But what do you do when you're really craving a sandwich, but have no sandwich bread? Well, if you're anything like me, you make a dogwich! AKA you make a sandwich on a hotdog bun. Problem solved.

Pros–
Speed. You can make a dogwich one handed, because you never have to set down. So if you’re right handed, your right hand rifles throught fridge, throwing ingredients into your left hand holding the bun. Way faster than laying the thing out on your counter and assembling it layer by layer.

Wash no dishes. Because you don't need a plate to set your dogwich on, that means you don't have a plate to wash. And when you're ready for condiments, there's no knife needed either! Just squirt a line of mustard n mayo straight down the middle.

Trippy. When you eat it, you feel like you’re at a ball game/ bbq, but it tastes like you’re at a Subway.

Mobility.You can eat a dogwich one handed, so one hand is free to do other stuff. I guess this is true with a real sandwich too, but the dogwich just feels so much more portable.

Aesthetics. A dogwich is much prettier than an hotdog. No weiner. And we've all seen a billion traditional square sandwiches.

Cons–
Adaptability.If you're using sliced cheese, you may have to tear the cheese, or use shredded (which is better on hotdogwich so it will melt).

Miniature portions. Depending on your current opinion of your waistline, this could be a pro or a con. Because a dogwich can only fit so much goodness, you may have to make several in order to be truly satisfied

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Memoirs of a Dirty Girl

I wrote this little memoir for my creative writing class. Eh Ahem.....

We walked out of the McDonalds, back into the gray wet air. As we crossed the street, headed toward the train station, I rifled through the plastic bags around my wrist. I reached into the yellow sack and pulled out a colorful plaid scarf. I’d never worn a scarf in public before, not even when I was a little kid, but my scarf virginity was lost at a shop earlier that day.
“It’s so cute, and it matches your shirt,” Morgan had told me.
“You’re only in Scotland once,” said Allison, “You have to get something Scottish.”
Stepping onto the sidewalk, I tried to wrap it around my neck, unsure of how it should look. The material was itchy against my skin and the end of the fabric hung awkwardly off my shoulders. My pace slowed as I tried to check my reflection in the window of the store. Something jerked my attention from the window back to the street.
It took me a moment to comprehend what I was seeing—a man, wearing nothing but a Speedo and shaving cream, running towards me. But there wasn’t just one, there were three. No, four.
Four nearly naked Scottish men doused in foam, headed my way.
At lighting speeds my hand dove into my bag and pulled out a camera, knowing this was a moment I would regret not capturing.
The group passed me one by one. The last one caught my attention. He had a small piece of fabric tied around his goods, a pair of swimming goggles on his forehead, and a smile the size of Great Britain. It looked liked he’d drained an entire can of Gillette shaving cream lathering up his skin. He was beautiful.
I aimed my camera at him, and he slowed to walk, posing for his moment of fame.
“If you want a picture you’ll have to give him a kiss,” his friend hollered.
My heart jumped at the word kiss. Our eyes met as we sized each other up. His undeniable expression of agreement made me fearless. I dropped my things where I was, walked up to him, and stood on my toes until my lips were just inches away from his.....

It was wet. It was soft. It was all over me.

I held out my arms and looked down at the foamy mess soaking into my clothes.
Wet, kissless, and brokenhearted, I shoved the dirty scarf back into the bag, and watched him run away with the culprits who had pushed him into me.

(the end)_

Aaaaaand......just for kicks, I dug up the pictures to prove it.



Monday, October 17, 2011

Flyin' like a G6

NYC Advertising Week. It may sound like a boring business conference. Wrongo! Monday night our man Jeff got us some sweet hookups to adweek's opening concert, where we saw Far East Movement, Natasha Bedingfield, and B.o.B. Holla!


Excuse all the annoying screaming....we, we, we, so excited.


Also our terrible off key singing.



Looky we made it into Advertising Week magazine! I spy with my little eye, Jeff Sheets and lots of ad kids. Obviously I was too short to make the cut. But dude, this stuff just doesn't happen in Utah.