Sunday, August 3, 2014

Dating Advice for my Future Sperm Donor Babies


1. Communication is Key

Don’t be afraid to tell someone what you need in a relationship. And don’t be surprised when they don’t care.

10 Pieces Of Honest Dating Advice

2. Looks Don’t Last

In this world, there are people prettier than you and people uglier than you. You can date any of them, but remember the hot ones can do better.

10 Pieces Of Honest Dating Advice

3. Don’t Take Things Personally

If someone rejects you, it doesn’t mean you’re not a good person. It just means you’re not good enough for them. Don’t get hung up on it! Happens all the time.

10 Pieces Of Honest Dating Advice

4. Don’t Chase. Be Chased.

Someone who really cares will smile when they see you, ask how it’s going, and if you can spare any change. Because they’ll probably be homeless.


10 Pieces Of Honest Dating Advice

5. Recognize Your Value

You are more precious than gold, so it’s normal for people to dump you. They know they don’t deserve someone as great as you.

10 Pieces Of Honest Dating Advice

6. Actions Speak Louder Than Words

If your bae says that they love you, but treats you like poopoo, they probably don’t love you. Simple logic.

10 Pieces Of Honest Dating Advice

7. Be Honest About Your Feelings

Be brave! Tell someone how you really feel! Honest and open communication will help you both understand that you aren’t on the same page.

10 Pieces Of Honest Dating Advice

8. Don’t Over Analyze

Stop trying to decipher someone’s every word, every text message, every move. Just relax and take comfort knowing that in the end, it’s not going to work out.

10 Pieces Of Honest Dating Advice

9. Learn to Love Yourself

Take yourself on dates, buy something that makes you happy, and tell yourself you’re pretty, because ain’t no boo gonna do that for you.

10 Pieces Of Honest Dating Advice

10. Never Settle

It's not worth it to be with someone who is embarrassed of you, who doesn't enjoy your company, or who deals drugs. You're better off alone. So make yourself comfortable in that twin sized bed. 
10 Pieces Of Honest Dating Advice



Monday, July 21, 2014

Top 10 Reasons to Stay at a Travelodge

Before you try to tell me, "Suck it up, princess," just let me say that I have stayed in some very dirty, sketchy motels and hostels by my own choice, and been perfectly satisfied. I'm not at a point in my life where it's worth an extra $100 to have a bellboy and fluffy white robe waiting for me. I appreciate an affordable motel, and I don't expect it to be nice, updated, comfortable, or not smell like cigarettes. All I need is a bed, bathroom, and a place to keep my stuff.

But fo real? These $60 Travelodge rooms were worse than any $10/night hostel I've ever experienced in Asia or Europe. And that has to be worth a laugh, right?



1. Eco-Friendly

Travelodge is lowering their carbon footprint by not using up (or providing) precious resources like toilet paper.


2. Hassle-free Showers

You don’t have to deal with disgusting shower curtains, or any shower curtains for that matter.

3. Thoughtfulness

They’re kind enough to unwrap your soap and test it out for you.





4. Cute Linens


Some of our towels and sheets had polka dots! Adorbs.





5. BYOB

They allow you to bring your own batteries for the remote control.



6. Aromatherapy

Weed-scented air fresheners make the hallways smell nice, and we even found a complimentary joint outside our door.



7. That Extra Touch

While they may not put mints on your pillow, they do leave gum on your headboard.



8. Security Guards

Friendly drunks will stand next to your car, and even outside your door to keep watch all night.


9. Nostalgia

Breakfast is served with warm milk, just like Mom used to make.


10. Housekeeping

Housekeepers respect your space and belongings by leaving things just how you left them. They might even drop off some new friends.