Sink Jacuzzi

I'm convinced I have one of the coolest jobs in the world. It's like 50 jobs in one. I can work breakfast, lunch, dinner, or night custodial. I can work line, dish room, or main dish. And within those categories I have even more options- scrubbing or unloading. Deserts/salads/silverware, runner, or wall of salad. Floors, pulpers, mopping, or hoods! The list goes on and on. I even have different outfits to choose from. I can wear a black chef coat. I can wear a purple polo. I can wear a cool t-shirt from home with a button up white thing over it. There's even sweet rubber boots if your job is in the splash zone. How could somebody ever tire of working at the MTC?

Earlier this year, the Lord's Cafeteria invested in a spiffy new giant dish washer machine. For those of you never exposed to the truly sublime, let me explain. After the thousands of missionaries eat in the cafeteria, they put all their trays filled with shiz and clever mixtures of uneaten food on a magic machine that carries them away into the unknown. As trays come through the conveyer belt, we throw all the trash away, spray all the food off every individual dish, and put it through the special water tunnel that makes dishes clean and burns your hands if you touch it.

Anyway, while the giant machine was being replaced, they built us a little replacement sink to wash all the dishes and trays in. I was rather unimpressed and unexcited to wash every freaking dish by hand. UNTIL - floyd turned it on. The sink is more like a mini jacuzzi. It jets hot water and bubbles so the dishes are constantly doing backflips. And it was in that moment I decided I was going to hot tub in the sink.

Sure I've joked about going swimming in the cooks' giant steam pots and taking a shower in the cart washer machine. I've tried fitting into the washing machine and sliding my body through the dish washer. But this is different. This is real. And let me share with you my train of thought.

Possible Bad Outcomes:
Food chunks come out of the jacuzzi jets.
People laugh at me in a swimsuit.
Nobody laughs.
The water burns me alive.
The breakfast manager finds my swimwear clad body floating dead in the kitchen sink.

Possible Good Outcomes:
The water is great.
Other people join me.
It becomes the pool party of the century.
I can write a book about my journey as an MTC hot tubbing pioneer.
I have a story cooler than the time Alejandra accidentally locked me inside a walk in refrigerator.

And apparently some babes did this at KFC and got fired.


I'll keep thinking it over.